December 2008
30 posts
From the cashier line (3)
: :While checking out a younger lady buying a CD::
: :While thinking the CD says "TRAIN" across the top::
Me: Oh, nice CD, I really like them.
Customer: Oh yeah! Me too, I saw it and just had to get it
: :CD is moving slowly closer to me down the conveyor belt::
Customer: What's your favorite song?
: :Now realizing instead of "TRAIN", it says "T-PAIN"::
Me: Uh, "What"...uh..."What It Is" (questioningly)
Customer: Oh, I never heard of that one
Me: Most people haven't, it's one of his B-side songs
Wook It Jawed
Ron Whitehead……drinking a lot is like Ron Whitehead. Smoking a lot is like his best friend. Michael from Iceland. I just smoked with him. He is the most popular Icelandic person EVER. He says his rock album is the best of the 20th century. I just scored a free copy. When I grow up I want to be a worm digger. Ron rewrote the declaration of independence, I also scored a free copy...
Complete script for The Dark Knight →
(via theportal)
“When I was 5 years old, my mom always told me that happiness was the key to...”
– Expectations
(via littlemiss) (via tuesdayslove) (via rabino)
(via marilink)
(via bru)
Drunken Q & A
Me: So what do you think your biggest flaw is?
Nick W: Allergies
::laughter::
Nick W: Probably my prejudice against people in favor of Sarah Palin
God Does Exist →
Myron Rolle
Is a football player for Florida State. He’s a guaranteed 1st-round draft pick and instant millionaire for next year’s NFL Draft. Also, he’s smart. He graduated in 2.5 years in the pre-med program with a 3.77 GPA. He is one of 32 college students to be named a Rhodes Scholar. Instead of taking the football career, he decided to skip his senior season at Florida State and the...
Nostalgia
I just went back and reread all of my tumblr posts. Damn, I used to be a lot more interesting. Overall, a very rewarding experience.
Quest for Social Improvement
There’s no denying the fact that I’m hilarious. However, I don’t know how to react when people laugh at something I say. Should I take the pretentious approach and laugh along with them? Or should I take the awkward approach and just nervously look around or stare at them? Any advice would be beneficial.
“In fact, throughout the past five years, Wikipedia has been the cornerstone for...”
– Included in the current paper I’m writing for English class. I hope my teacher appreciates honesty.
Bullet
tonyhead:
jmluck:
The decision not to smoke on my way back from Half Price Books just saved my life. Apparently, I had a very bad gas leak while driving, in fact my truck broke down a couple miles from home, and if I would’ve smoked, I would’ve flicked ashes and my butt out the window, thus causing my truck to explode.
Well thank god, because now your death caused by cigarettes will be later...